the peculiar feeling of homecoming
I'm back at home for my reading week, and today was quite a nothing day for me. I just finished all of my midterm work, and I didn't have any plans for today, nor did I really want to make any plans.
I think I'm starting to have the realization that my life really is at my university now. I spend (nearly) every night working in the studio, I eat when I want, I see people I know everywhere, I play piano at all hours of the night just because I can.
I thought that when I came home I would feel this sense of relief, that I'm finally back. That feeling is starkly absent. I feel more like I'm on a weird staycation where I'm just waiting around. Yes, I'm visiting some friends this week and I'm really excited about that, but I feel very much like I have unfinished business back at school (obviously, considering I'm only 1/16th done my degree).
I had a pretty rough week academically, and am expecting a pretty rough slap in the face when I get my midterm grades back. But hey, at least everything's submitted, right? I'm hoping to gather the mental energy to write about a dilemma I've had for a while, that being whether architecture is even right for me fully. I do fully love it actually, so I think it is for me, but I feel that I'm thinking on a different wavelength creatively than I need to for this career. All in all though, however much I may debate if this is for me, now that I'm home all I'm really looking forward to is going back.